Stay at Home Mom is a Silly Job Description

I have been reading various blogs by "stay-at-home moms". I think this is a really strange way to describe yourself, as if you were only a mother. I like housewife much better because this to me encompasses more tasks: childcare, housework, cooking, financial management, husband care. You are maintaining the house and all the people in it at an executive level, not just being a babysitter. Since the average American woman with children under 6 spends 2.5 hours caring for family members, 2.4 hours doing housework, and 3.8 hours on leisure (including 2 hours watching TV) per day, this suggests that stay at home moms are mostly not mothering but instead doing other (equally valid) activities.

I used to work as a preschool teacher and spent 8 hours a day with 4-10 (it depended on the time period) three and four year olds. There is some "mothering" that goes on (for instance, training the children how to behave; comforting them when sick/sad) but a lot of what I did was just being present while the children did stuff, to make sure they didn't do something dangerous and to step in if needed. Even three year olds are capable of doing most things for themselves with supervision. I can't imagine that being a "stay at home mom" is any different. But as a SAHM, you only have 1 or 2 children to tend to, and thus have a lot of downtime. Being a mother after the first year or so is not really a full time job. It is only when you add in all the other life maintenance chores (cleaning, cooking, logistics, etc.) that you attain a 40+ work week. So calling yourself a SAHM means that: 1. you have a small baby; 2. you are actually a housewife or 3. you are significantly underemployed.

Also, tying your entire identity to your status of being a mother seems weird and unhealthy. It puts so much pressure on your kid! For that reason, mothers who are at home should be busy with other projects (like blogging!) but it would be better if the blogging was not about how they are a mother and focused on some other aspects of themselves, like their opinions on politics or how to make origami.