Wednesday, December 28, 2011

Mommy, I Need You (So I Can Ignore You)

Little R is definitely very attached to me. She gives me gummy kisses, smiles whenever I appear, and throws her little arms around my neck when I pick her up. But most of the time when we are together, she ignores me.

She will venture off on her various explorations, toddling along at the fastest speed she can manage, bending over to pick up items off the floor and then sticking them in her mouth, or making for the shelves or table to pull off and destroy whatever she can reach. She doesn't usually want to play with me, or cuddle (unless she just injured herself), because she is too busy with her Very Important Tasks. Occasionally she will glance in my direction, to make sure I am there (though this doesn't mean she wants to actually interact with me).

It's only if I am not there that my importance becomes clear: she gets a little bit fussy, her explorations become less daring, and if I am gone too long (all day, for instance), she becomes clingy and anxious. She vocalizes less, is not as physically active, and plays in a more subdued and less creative manner (though she doesn't usually cry or whine that much, as she's pretty easy going).

Little R doesn't need my active physical care as much as she used to. Now she just needs me to be there, in the background and unobtrusive, but ready to appear as required. It's strange to find yourself (always previously the star of the show) recast as the backstage personnel. I imagine this will be a continuing theme through the teenage years and beyond, so I better get used to it!


  1. So it's not just my toddler that does this!

  2. Bean doesn't do this. She always wants me to show her something or explain something. Sometimes she will play on her own and while she plays she will scream from whatever room she's in, "Mommy! Where are you!?" and I answer and she says "Ok....MOMMY! HOW ARE YOU!?" and I say, "I'm doing good!" and she continues to play. But she asks me where I am and how I am about 20 times every half hour..which is slightly annoying..ha!

  3. I would love to show/explain things to my daughter (since I'm kind of a know-it-all by nature) but she really doesn't like it. She wants to do it herself thankyouverymuch! She won't even eat food off a spoon if you are holding it. (She does like looking at things together though.)

    Interesting how children's preferences can vary so much.